This week, the state of Florida decided to re-count as many countable items as they could. Though the national press focused on ballot counting for political elections of minor consequence, many other, more impactful, counting initiatives were conducted. The re-count of last week’s college football games that included Florida teams resulted in a dramatic turnaround that may affect the national playoff picture.
Notre Dame, formerly number 3 in the college rankings and already ordering national championship hats (though oddly they contain the phrase “Roll Tide”), appeared to be a walk-away 42-13 winner in South Bend when the game against FSU finished Saturday evening. A re-count has reversed that original result, giving Florida State a 37 to 28 win.
“After a careful review of the numbers, we found that two of Notre Dames touchdowns should have gone to FSU,” explained Angeline Fritz of the Florida Bureau of Counting. “In addition to those formerly miscounted touchdowns, we also discovered 10 points scored by the Seminoles within a week of the game.”
Fritz explained that Florida rules allow for points scored by teams during practices within three days of scheduled games as long as the players still think they are playing the game in question. The location and timing of the points scored does not matter as long as the intent of the points scored was to beat Notre Dame.
“It’s an unusual rule, but we have to trust Florida on this one,” said Notre Dame coach Brian Kelly. “My hats off to them,” added the coach who is known for his peaceful acceptance of bad news. Other officials from Notre Dame echoed Kelly’s sentiment, explaining that no one has re-counted more than Florida, so they have to be accepted as the experts.
In related news, a Tallahassee 7-11 has found 2 missing packs of Newport cigarettes during a re-count of tobacco products. Investigations are underway.